in death

God,

It is quiet today,

As it has been every day for months.

My mind is not as quiet as the still air;

Today,

My mind is as busy as it is every day.

God,

I want to thank you, the creator,

For making this world,

And the last,

And the next,

And for allowing me to live in it

This is my final thank you;

A final prayer.

Mom,

Thank you for loving me.

Thank you for trying your best.

Thank you for the clothes on my back,

And the food made with love,

And the roof over my head.

Mom,

Everything is so still today.

Do you think it will be this quiet

When you get home today?

Father.

I hated you.

I loved you for years.

You betrayed me.

You betrayed my mother.

I'd be happier

If I didn't see you at the funeral.

My wives,

Thank you for loving me.

Thank you for being kind to me.

I will love you now,

As I did in life,

Even in death.

And last,

I would like to thank this knife

That will be the last thing I feel.

I am glad

To spend my last moments

With an old friend;

Though I will not be cutting up fruits again.

God,

Everything is so still today.

Did you know today would be the end for me?

After all,

I circled the date on my calender

Months ago.

Thank you for letting me live

But I could not bear the burden.

So thank you for letting me die.

Please remember me even in death.

I will remember you.

I carried your love with me to the grave.

The wind chimes sound lovely today.

Will they sound the same when I am gone?

12.9.2021 | by blumiere